Author Struggles

Happy December!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving with family and friends.  I believe we ate way too much food, but I guess that's expected around this time of year!

Just a head's up, this is kind of a rambling post.  So, bear with me.

For the last couple of years, I've found myself struggling with my writing.  My characters seem to want to take weeks' long breaks and finding the magic that is normally there for me has been difficult, putting it mildly.  I've tried taking sabbaticals, I've tried forcing the words to come out, I've tried turning my focus to other creative outlets (sewing, crocheting, cross-stitching, paint-by-numbers), but not much has been working.  In essence, I believe all I was doing was finding new ways to distract myself from the core problem... where has my love for words gone?

In fact, for the last few months, I've been concerned that the joy and awesomeness of writing just isn't with me anymore.  I don't lay awake at night mulling over scenes in my head.  I don't seek out my computer to get my jumbled thoughts out or else I'll implode.  In a lot of ways, writing has become a chore lately and I don't like that.

I've been trying to figure out how to get myself out of whatever this funk is.  I've tried keeping a writing journal, using writing prompts, even going back to writing my thoughts on the various books I've been reading.  Not so much a full-on book reviews like I used to do on a book review blog I had, but more my thoughts on whether I liked it or not and why.

None of these things have seemed to help much, but last night I lay awake for almost three hours while my current characters (Commander Vorsky, Rosa, and Daemos in particular) decided to act out a couple of different scenes that will be coming up in the manuscript I'm writing.  I was tired and wanted to sleep, but they were determined.  And since this is the first time in about a year since this has happened, I let them have at it.  I'm glad I did, as I feel as though I might actually be seeing a light at the end of this dark chasm of struggle I've been dealing with.

Sorry for the ramblings, but I felt I needed to get this out into the electronic world.  Maybe there's someone who visits this blog and has been having the same struggles as me.  I just want to leave this post with encouraging words of don't give up hope just yet.  I've loved writing for as long as I can remember and that love doesn't go away.  It just sometimes takes a vacation, usually when you least expect it.  But it will come back and when it does, be prepared. 

I'm off now to finish up the latest chapter so I can give it to my co-author for his input and suggested changes.  And hopefully, fingers crossed, I'll have the passionate spark once more to move forward with this particular manuscript so I can see it through to the end!

Character Challenges

Good morning all and Happy Friday!

Sorry it's been a while since my last post, but I've been hard at work on the latest manuscript and am happy to share that I'm over half-way through the first draft!  13 Chapters have been completed and there's at least 7-10 more to go.  The Galactic Dynasty series is getting more and more interesting as events continue to unfold and I'm loving where this latest book is taking the characters!

Speaking of characters... as you all know, I'm a huge character-driven reader.  If I can't connect with the characters, the story tends to lose my interest quickly.  Same goes for writing.  I've got to be totally into my characters or I rapidly lose my connection with them and therefore am unable to write their stories.  So, as a whole, I find it very easy to slip into the various mindsets of my different characters and love spending time in each of their individual heads.

With that said, I have encountered probably the most difficult character for me to write to date.  This character is in the Galactic Dynasty series and plays pivotal yet vague roles in the development of the story as well as being the supporting character to my main characters.  His name is Daemos and he is actually an it... he's Artificial Intelligence at its most refined and he's extremely complex.  This translates to him being very difficult to grasp in my mind in order for me to write him into various scenes.

On the one hand, he's a computer program.  He's logic and databanks and 1's and 0's.  On the other hand, he's an evolving program and he's beginning to simulate near flawlessly the various human interactions that he has observed and analyzed from the human characters he's encountered.  But he's still just a computer program at the core of it all and he does not actually feel the emotions he tries to simulate.

Anyway, he has been the most challenging character to write because I'm trying to get inside the mindset of a computer that is attempting to evolve to a more human-like state.  And sometimes I get ahead of myself and give him characteristics or actions that make him more human-like.  That's when my co-author has to step in and tone things down to where Daemos actually is in his development or evolution.  You should hear the heated discussions that take place when we're dealing with Daemos in particular and amazingly enough, Daemos is the only character that we tend to have heated discussions about.  And I'm sure it's because Daemos is the most difficult character for me to figure out and portray.

I love the challenge that Daemos continuously presents to me, though.  I feel that because of this challenge, I am able to develop more as an author.  It forces me to step outside my comfort zone and explore unique solutions in order to make Daemos as realistic an AI as possible without losing the fact that he is just a computer when you strip everything else away.  I think that he's actually preparing me for when I begin exploring the other alien species that my human characters have yet to meet in this series and hopefully when I reach that point, I'll be able to come up with some intriguing species that my readers have yet to encounter in other sci-fi/adventure novels.

So, as much as I sometimes want to bang my head against a wall where Daemos is concerned, he is rapidly becoming my favorite character out of all the ones taking up space in my head.  He's unique and fascinating and a complete enigma, even to his creator, and I really look forward to seeing just how far he'll go in his evolution.

For the writers out there, who has been your most challenging character to date?  And what made them so challenging for you?  I'd love to hear from you, so please leave a comment below and happy writing!

For the readers out there, who has been your favorite fictional character to date?  And what makes them your favorite?  I'd love to hear from you as well, so please leave a comment below and happy reading!

Celebrate the Book

I'm finally back in the loop and had a great time in Carlisle PA at the Celebrate the Book festival.  Here's me at the booth:

I ended up signing and selling a few books and had a really great time getting to know other authors.  I'm not sure when my next event will be, but I'll keep everyone posted. :)

Now I'm back and have finally mentally recovered enough to begin working on "The Legend of Goat Head Lodge" and "Starward" again.  I was already in Leyla's mind this morning and will continue to write some more from her perspective tomorrow.  As for Rosa, she got a little break while I delved into the mind of a different character by the name of Daemos.  I will not, however, explain anything more about Daemos at this time as that character is somewhat of a work in progress and I wouldn't want to spoil anything.  I'll just say that writing from Daemos' perspective is extremely challenging!

Well, break's over and it's time to get back at it.  See ya later, peeps!